This is the draft clip I made for the blind crit session today, with sound I added [not by Terry and Nick]. I'll make further considerations, tests and adjustments regarding the following points.
General
Quiet observations of everyday things, poetic, dreamy, subtle
Some surprises, revealing the hidden
Need to specify what the message is. How ambiguous or descriptive should it be, for the audience in England to understand
Don't overload messages (subjective nature of memory, on top of nostalgia, divide and loss)
Repetition of images were unnecessary, and some images dragged on
Length (7 minutes) seemed okay [this will be different once it's looped]
Sound
Sound at the end of the clip wasn't prominent enough [this would change when it's on loop]
Letting sound be sound works with images
Should relate directly to images, which will clarify the message
Some of these were surprising for me to hear, as my intentions were perceived in a different way (for example, repetition of images with different background sound was to enhance the sense of subjective memory). I thought it might seem too long and too subtle, but that didn't seemed to be a problem with the group I met today.
